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major.self.disclosure.moment

Music is the area where i am absolutely the most insecure. I think that may be true with all musicians; but i’m just voicing it here. I self evaluate and critique more than anyone. I hate my own singing voice. I’m just basically super self conscious about music in general. Even drums, an instrument where i would rate myself at a professional level. Since we moved out of the house six months ago, i have been able to practice zero. No place to. So when CPM started up, and even now, i’m super rusty. Now CPM’s music is no challenge drumming wise, mind you, so i don’t have a problem kicking out the beats required by this music; but there is a definate lack of flow yet from behind the kit. I’m sure if this were the Dave Matthews Band, the flow would be back already; but i’m major sympathising (sp?) with Ringo Star over here–backbeat, backbeat, backbeat, and no place for anything else! Poor guy couldn’t hear anything anyway, and besides, that music just doesn’t call for anything more! :P So here I am trying to get some flow–read Dave Weckle, Carter Beauford, et. al.–back into my playing and i’m forced into Ringo-backbeat-backbeat-backbeat-Star. So me and Ringo. Yeah. ‘Cept for being rich.

Anyway, i’m still recovering from a CPM practice where the boys made fun of (i think?) one of my tunes…

/major.self.discloure.